Obituary of Joan M. Stadnik

Joan Mary Stadnik (neé Borek) was born on March 20, 1920, the second daughter and youngest child of Johan Borek and Maria Magdalena Wielgosz. She grew up in Brooklyn and Manhattan, generally attending New York City public schools except for second grade which she spent at St. Vincent de Paul R.C. School in Williamsburg Brooklyn, where she made her First Communion. She later graduated from Washington Irving High School, where she was active with the school newspaper and yearbook. She was also an accomplished seamstress. After working for a couple of years at Henri Bendel, she was hired by The Singer Company to teach sewing to new purchasers of their sewing machines. She met John Stadnik in 1939. They courted on and off as world events swirled into the cataclysm of World War II. John enlisted in the Army, was sent to Officer Candidate School after his basic training, and was commissioned as a Second Lieutenant. Stationed for a short period in California and Washington State, he was eventually part of the force sent to reconquer the Aleutian Islands that had been seized by the Japanese. During this period, Joan and he carried on a frequent correspondence by letter. John asked Joan to marry him and she, having never left the confines of New York before, travelled across the US to meet him when he was on leave in Seattle. They were married on December 1, 1942, at the Chapel in the Pines on the Fort Lawton Army Base. They had a one-week honeymoon in the Seattle area. Then John had to report back to the Aleutians. Joan returned to Brooklyn, where she was living with her mother in an apartment at 209 Bedford Avenue. She participated in the home front war effort, working for a period at the Brewster Aircraft Company in Long Island City, and later at Sperry Gyroscope Company in New Hyde Park, NY. She volunteered to help with American Red Cross projects, rolling bandages, and also volunteered with the Civil Air Defense unit in the Williamsburg section of Brooklyn. After the war in the Pacific moved away from the Aleutians, John was transferred to the Military Police and in early 1944 was stationed at Whitehall Street in NYC. With this assignment, their family life was able to begin in earnest. After the end of the war, John and Joan moved to Bethpage Long Island, and Joan helped John launch a restaurant supply business. They worked side by side in building this business, Joan helping to keep the books and run the office while John handled customer sales and buying stock. As the business grew, Joan was able to spend less time running the office, and they began to raise a family. Their eldest son, Thomas, was born in 1952, and their second son, Andrew, was born in 1959. Joan’s mother, Mary Borek, lived with Joan and John, and provided her example and moral support to her daughter and son-in-law, and lent a hand to help care for her two grandsons. In the mid-60s, Joan and John had to move their business from Bethpage to Amityville. The new location provided more space and the business grew accordingly. They commuted from Bethpage to Amityville for several years before they found a home that they decided to purchase in Amityville, moving there finally in 1977. Joan and John were devout Catholics and were very involved with their parish, St. Martin of Tours in Bethpage. Joan was a member of the Rosary Altar Society, and served in several of its officer positions, while John was active with the Holy Name Society. She and John were sent as part of a delegation from St. Martin’s to the official blessing of the cornerstone for the new St. Rose of Lima parish in Massapequa, which began a long term association for them with this then “new” parish. When they later moved from Bethpage to Amityville, St. Rose became their parochial venue of choice. Joan’s faith and love for her family disposed her to provide and care for them as best as she could. She provided transportation and other forms of support for her sons during their school years and their participation in youthful activities, such as the Altar Boy Society at St. Martin’s and the Cub and Boy Scouts of Pack and Troop 159. She provided a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and encouraged and helped with study. She continued to help in all these ways and with school-related transport issues as her sons made their way daily to attend Jesuit high schools in New York City. Joan loved sewing, knitting and embroidery. She was always making various clothing and household items. She took up quilting after encouragement from one of her sisters-in-law, and participated in a local quilting circle in Amityville. She was also fascinated with history and for several years was a volunteer at Raynham Hall in Oyster Bay, where she put her talents as a seamstress to use in helping the Hall to preserve its collective antique Townsend family clothing and household linens that are used in the exhibits. While her husband and two sons provided adequate employment for her attentions, Joan remained attached to her female relatives, beginning with her mother and her mother’s sisters (primarily her Aunt Caroline Kuduk and Aunt Anna Tabaka), and her circle of cousins among her aunts’ daughters, as well as her nieces on both sides of the family. She maintained correspondence with many of them until her later years. But Joan, being a considerate and helping person, also found time for her friends in the neighborhood or parish and their daughters, providing a sounding board and emotional support to many over the years. When they finally became grandparents, Joan and John were happy to see a new generation established. They enjoyed their time with their grandchildren when they were able. Joan, finally having four granddaughters, was excited at the prospect of sharing her knowledge and creative tips with them, but time and the loss of John in 1995 took their toll. Beginning in the early 2000s, while she wrestled with the initial stages of dementia, her fall that resulted in a broken hip was a health reversal from which she never fully recovered. Joan is survived by her two sons, Thomas and Andrew, her daughters-in-law Jennifer and Susan, her grandchildren Alexandra, Matthew, Magdalena, John, Samantha, and Anastasia, her cousin Stephanie Lukasiak (aged 92), her nephews Stanley Jr. and John Borek, and her nieces Barbara (Borek) Pierce, Mary Ann (Borek) Borello, Monica (Borek) McCabe and Lenore (Borek) Bagur. Donations in memory of Joan Stadnik can be made to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, National Capital Chapter, 5845 Richmond Highway Suite 800, > Alexandria, VA 22303 (703) 399-2900 - go to https://donate.lls.org/lls/donate to donate directly. By Tom Stadnik